


maybe the night.

by wineandsoju



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack Treated Seriously, Demons, Excessive Use of Bro and Bro By-Products, Fantasy, M/M, Paranormal, Sleep Paralysis, side jenren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:13:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21793576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wineandsoju/pseuds/wineandsoju
Summary: when renjun’s sleep paralysis demon visited him one night and held his hand, he couldn’t help but say “this feels a bit edward cullen-ly.”
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno, Huang Ren Jun/Na Jaemin, side
Comments: 11
Kudos: 125
Collections: ’00 FIC FEST: ROUND ONE





	maybe the night.

**Author's Note:**

> for prompt [#00133](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1xGmLcArOBYmX2ZU5Lmjsjdn2GMeo74g--HiFyiL5vRs/edit#gid=1107817662&range=A134)  
> title from [ben&ben](https://open.spotify.com/track/1yDiru08Q6omDOGkZMPnei?si=oDw_VvFVQCG-IHhfckqACQ)
> 
> thank you for my wonderful beta-reader whom i'll most likely tag once reveals are done!

September means cool breezes passing by in contrast with the heat of the sun that's still not over its summer days. It pries students away from their vacation days and throws them back into their busy academic lives. For most of them, it signifies their return to their humdrum routines of attending lectures, laboring on papers, and sitting mind-numbing exams. For some, it thrusts them into a new life: freshmen and transferees alike have to adjust to a new campus, meet new people, move into dormitories or apartments near the school area.

For Renjun and his friends, it's an extension of their high school lives.

It was months ago when the group was sat on Jeno's living room floor, hearts racing in anticipation of what would unravel before them as they open the envelopes in their hands. Jeno, having been accepted on an early admission, was busy playing the latest release from his favorite game developer. 

"You all got in, I'm sure of it," he said in between frustrated grunts when his character was slow to react to his commands. "The envelopes are thick. Those are acceptance letters."

Nobody dared to contradict him out of fear of jinxing their chances. Yangyang would have spoken up, but he was too jittery, hands shaking as he placed the letter opener between the flap and slicing right through the fold.

"Hand it over," Donghyuck ordered. He, too, was overwhelmed with nervousness as he opened his package.

When Renjun finally tore the envelope open, the three took deep breaths, counting a few seconds before they simultaneously pulled out the letters enclosed in the paper sleeves. Jeno rolled his eyes at the theatrics.

It was approximately eight months ago when Renjun and his friends yelled out in unison when they found out they all got accepted into the same university.

From then until this moment, nothing has changed, albeit they're all college freshmen now. They're also wearing different clothes, no more high school uniforms that made life easier back then. There aren't any buses to take to and from the campus. There isn't the limitations brought by minority. They're all adults now, after all.

Aside from those things, everything remains the same, except it's all placed in a different setting.

Renjun laughs at the familiarity of it all: the cafeteria that's not much different from the one they had in high school. Jeno's eyes are glued to his phone screen as per usual. Donghyuck's side is pressed onto Yangyang's as the younger shares stories from yonder, as if they haven't heard enough of them before.

“Yeah, when I was a child, I fell into a pile of bricks, and I don’t remember much of it after that,” Yangyang tells his friends.

“What?!” The fascination in Renjun’s voice couldn’t be hidden. He should sound more concerned, really, but he's heard much worse things that the boy had done before.

“This was back in Germany. My friends and I were playing hide-and-seek and I was up on a tree. Best hiding spot, right?”

“Nah, that’s just stupid.” Jeno looks up from his phone just to tell his friend off for making a dumb decision.

“Well, you’re right, Jeno,” the younger Chinese agrees. “Turns out I was wrong because the branch I was perched on snapped and I just fell... on a pile of bricks.”

“Bro, you’re a survivor! I can’t believe I’m friends with someone who’s already living their second life,” the eldest of the group exclaims.

“And after that I could see ghosts,” Yangyang concludes his story.  [1]

“Bullshit,” Donghyuck, who’s been uncharacteristically quiet the whole time, finally speaks his piece. “That’s from an episode of Buzzfeed Unsolved. You can’t fool me.”

“What the fuck, bro,” Renjun’s voice drips with feelings of betrayal. “I trusted you.”

“For someone who declares they’re a non-believer, you sure have a wide range of knowledge of Buzzfeed Unsolved.” Yangyang smirks.

“Shut up, I watch it for true crime commentary.” Donghyuck blushes.

“Sure you do. But bro,” he pats Renjun’s shoulder. “I didn’t lie when I said I can see ghosts.”

“Bro, tell me more.”

Jeno lets out a deep sigh as he watches his friends talk animatedly about each of their brushes with the supernatural. Even Donghyuck, who usually dismisses these kinds of conversations, joins the discourse. The boy is a big fan of the Youtube duo, after all, and he would be a fool to turn away from any discussion about them.

The blonde pretends he’s not listening, eyes still glued to his phone screen. He can’t help but be concerned, though, when the talk turns to a much darker topic.

Maybe he’s fully listening in now that Renjun's sharing stories from the times he suddenly woke up in the middle of the night, limbs unmoving despite his mind being indubitably active and alert.

“Renjun,” he doesn’t mask his worry. “Why didn't you tell me this before?”

"They happened when I was still back in China," the boy explains. "I haven't had those kinds of dreams ever since I moved here. Not ever."

Jeno wants to know more. He thought he knew everything about his friend, but sometimes Renjun talks about life before his move to Korea, and Jeno's reminded of the fact that there were still a lot of things he has to learn when it comes to Renjun.

He aims to ask about those things, but he's forced to shy away and dissolve in the background when a slew of Mandarin comes pouring out of his friends' mouths. He can only make out some familiar words, but he ends up getting lost in the conversation.

Maybe he should have joined Donghyuck when he took the Foreign Language classes back in high school.

"Bro, you're still helping me move in, right?"

Jeno doesn't remember how long he had zoned out. He was already deep into his game until his friend tapped on his shoulder. 

"Yangyang, Hyuck, what about you? Are you helping?" Renjun also asks the others.

The two in question, already hunched in their own little conversation cave, share a look that Renjun can't identify, and he braces himself for their answer. 

"Sorry," they say in unison.

"I have some errands to run," Yanyang shares.

"I… uhm… I have to go over the list of student organizations. Yeah." Donghyuck sounds less convincing.

"So it's just you and I again, Jen," Renjun's tone is neither disappointed nor angry. It can be taken as excited, even. "Like always."

"Like always," Jeno confirms and makes a mental note to thank his friends for the opportunity. It's been a while since he had some alone time with Renjun, after all.

An alarm bell rings, signalling the end of the university-wide lunch break. The students in the cafeteria scatter, leaving trays of unfinished food on the shelves near the trash bins. Some stay put, heads bent low on the unclean tables, looking like college life had already taken a toll on them, even when the day is still far from over.

The four friends disappear in the sea of people: Jeno, surreptitiously placing earbuds into his ears, in wish for drowning his thoughts of spending the afternoon and the high night with Renjun. The said boy who's been lingering in his quiet fantasies walks beside him, chanting the timetable printed on the paper he's holding, afraid to get lost in the vast school grounds. Yangyang and Donghyuck, still huddled together, snickers swirling with the tapping of their feet on the cold linoleum floor.

"Hey, where's your dorm again?" Donghyuck, for a moment, lets his attention be pulled away from Yangyang, asks.

"Albertus Building, 1136. Why? Planning to help me move in after all?"

"Maybe," Yangyang answers for his friend. 

"That isn't ominous at all," Renjun says, but his words are drowned under his friends' sniggering.

He would have asked what the two were so amused by, but the second bell rings and soon he's being pulled away, Jeno's strides fast and forward, and the other two bid them goodbye, leaving nothing behind but the echoes of their laughter.

x-x-x-x-x

It was sometime in the mid-afternoon when Renjun realized college won't be as stressful as high school was for him. If the first day is of any indication, attendance isn't that important—at least for professors, that is. 

By his second afternoon class, he learns that being present in class is the exception, not the rule. Upperclassmen tell him this isn't the case for the rest of the year, though, if he wants to stay in college. Still, they advised him to save himself some time and just go on his way and rest. They said he's going to want a lot of it once his classes come at him like a speeding train with no functional brakes.

Maybe his low expectations of university life were premature.

Still, he heeds his seniors' words despite the fear slowly settling in his stomach.

The sun is still high above the clouds when he crosses the field, watching his peers grumble about. There aren't many of them walking around campus at the hour, and Renjun takes pleasure in the expanse of the field his eyes can reach. He squints his eyes as he looks up at the bright sky. His smile greets the sun, and he waves at it, as if greeting an old friend. In his mind, he sends regards to the moon, thinking how it would be a delight to see him so soon.

He waits for it to peek from the clouds, like it did plenty of times before, on afternoons like this. The moon doesn't greet him today, and his smile falters. He waves to the sun again, this time to bid it goodbye. 

"I'll see you tonight," he whispers to himself. There's just a short way to nighttime, and he can wait.

"You have a date tonight?" 

Renjun startles at the voice coming from behind him. He clenches his hands into fists as he faces the person who's caught him in his moment of peace.

"What the fuck, Yango," he sputters when he sees his friend running towards him. "How did you even hear me?"

"Lip reading," his friend explains. He would have believed him if this weren't the first time such a thing happened.

"So, who's the lucky guy?" Donghyuck seemingly appears out of thin air from his sinistral side. 

Renjun blinks as he pushes any thoughts of the paranormal out of the way.

"Nobody."

"Awww so it isn't Je—"

The eldest pretends he doesn't see Donghyuck pinch their friend, but he laughs when the youngest yelps because of it. He doesn't let on that he sees the side-eye Yangyang receives, he's not into prying into things he understands he isn't supposed to know.

"What are you doing here anyway," he changes the subject. "Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"We're skipping, like you." 

"Okay, Twiddledum and Twiddledee, no need to be all chorale on me."

"Any _ who, _ " Donghyuck sings the last syllable, "we'll be able to help you move in, after all."

"Oh, great. The Little Twin Stars to the rescue." 

"Hey! That's no way to talk to people bearing gifts." Yangyang waves a plastic bag in his face, bottles clinking inside it with every shake. "Drinks to ward the evil spirits away!"

"And to welcome the good spirits in!" Renjun exclaims, excited with the presents.

Without missing a beat, his friends hook their arms onto his and pulls him away from the field towards the dormitories. They walk in a crisscross pattern, much like the way they did back in the day, until they miss their rhythm and they fall to the pavement one by one. Someone—at this point, Renjun doesn't remember who—proposes a race to his room, and they arrive at his door in the nick of time, all three catching their breaths. He laughs heartily, thinking how juvenile it is, but still knowing he wouldn't trade moments like this for the world.

_ Moving in is a breeze. _

It really isn't that difficult—or so Renjun hoped. It was, for a while, until Yangyang thought it was a great idea to open a soju bottle in the midst of their unpacking. They were still productive even after a few shots, until he was made to go out and fetch snacks from the convenience store. He tried protesting, saying it was  _ his  _ room, why should  _ he  _ buy the food? His words were unheard, though, as he was pushed past the doorway, his friends claiming he who didn't pay for the drinks ought to buy the snacks.

On his way back from the store, he runs into Jeno whose professors, according to him, were too earnest for having attended all his classes, up to the last one. They shared a few digs about the faculty members, Jeno complaining about the workload he has to finish by the following week, and Renjun about the lack of it, and the chaos that's now likely brewing in his dorm room. 

They both laugh at how their friends can't be trusted to be alone, together.

"SHOTS!!!" 

_ Of course _ , they're always right when it comes to Donghyuck and Yangyang. 

Jeno doesn't even have the chance to take his shoes off before he's pulled onto the floor. He settles down in front of the upturned box the two had fancied for a makeshift table and downs a shot.

"I thought," he says as he uses the sleeve of his hoodie to wipe his mouth, "we were here to help Renjun unpack."

"Come on, Brobert, we're having a welcoming party! Don't you rain on our parade!" 

Renjun closes the door behind him and gapes at the mess his friends have made: clothes haphazardly thrown in a pile on his bed, some of them almost on the floor, boxes opened but not unpacked, Donghyuck lying spread-eagle on the rug they managed to lay next to his bed before things went awry.

He has half a mind to kick the sleeping boy as he snores and mumbles nonsensical monologues. Instead he takes the spot beside Jeno when he sees the latter patting the wooden flooring and gestures at Yangyang to pour him a drink. 

At half past ten, Renjun's sprawled on his bedroom floor, right next to Donghyuck who's still deep in slumber. The world spins around him, and the sound of his friends still chattering pounds into his senses. He plans on yelling at them to be quiet, but his chest heaves and an unheavenly noise escapes his mouth.

"Oh no, he's gonna blow!" Yangyang announces amusedly.

Jeno rushes to his side and helps him sit upright, massaging his back once it's off the floor. He feels the burn in his chest and braces himself to rush to the bathroom, feeling like his stomach is going to come out his mouth soon. He heaves and coughs, but years of binge drinking with Jeno prepared him for this. In the end, his worries are set adrift as he gulps a full glass of water Yangyang has helpfully handed him.

"Uhm," he hears him speak, "maybe we should leave."

"I'll stay," his other friend says. "I'll help Renjun sober up. Take Donghyuck back to his room, if you can."

"Or, I don't know..." Yangyang's already pulling the snoozing boy up into a piggyback carry. There's a glint in his eyes as he smiles boyishly. "Maybe he could sleepover at my place."

But Renjun's too buzzed to make anything of it, too tired to walk them to the door. He sets for just shooing them away with a wave of his hand.  _ Thanks,  _ he mouths.  _ I had fun. _

"I hope you like our present!" 

"I did," he manages to answer.

"Oh, there's another one!" His friend peeks from the closing door, not leaving without flashing another smile at him.

When Jeno closes the door at last, Renjun is on his back again, facing the window adjacent to his bed. He stares at the moon, its face in full view, all bright and round. He raises his arm to wave hello, but he doesn't manage to do so. He doesn't because he's being pulled to his feet, his friend nagging him to wash up in the shower. It would make him feel better, Jeno said.

By the time he steps out of the bathroom, shivering from the cold night breeze making its way through his windows left ajar, Jeno had already finished arranging most of his belongings. 

Maybe it's the alcohol, or maybe it's the way the moonlight illuminates the room. Perhaps it's how the little amount of light rests on Jeno, now gazing back at him, smile almost overpowering the round moon. Whatever it is, Renjun feels heat creeping through his body, urging him to take the space beside him. Once again, like he always does. The same feeling urges him to lean his head on his friend's shoulder. 

Once again, like he used to do.

What happened after is of no importance, for nothing else mattered as they stayed in each other's presence for as long as they both needed, before the night ended.

At a quarter to midnight, Renjun bids Jeno goodbye. His words might have drowned under the chatter along the dormitory's hallways, but his lingering hug sends his  _ take care  _ wishes to Jeno quite clearly.

He stares at the still unopened boxes spread across his bedroom floor and looks at the clock Jeno hung above his full-body mirror. 

_ It can wait,  _ he thinks.  _ It's too late anyway. _

The night is already silent and calm when Renjun finishes rearranging the things on his desk. Only the hushed murmurs from the halls outside can be heard, softly mingling with the whispers of the night breeze. A small flick, then a flicker of flame, a rustle when the wind hits the fire now sitting atop a candle.

Renjun stretches his limbs once he's seated on his desk chair. He rests his head on his hands as stares at the full moon, enchanted by its brightness in stark contrast with the dark nothingness around it. The campus' streetlights peek from his dark curtains, and he smiles.

_ Here's to a new beginning. _

It still feels like home. A distinct jasmine aroma surrounds him, replaced by the subtle scent of burnt wax settling once he blows the candle flames out. 

Sleep comes easy to Renjun. It must have been only a few minutes after he hid under the duvet when his eyes started feeling heavy. He let the somnolence carry him away and let his subconscious take over. He couldn't wait to open his eyes to a new day.

_ Renjun _

He stirs in his sleep.

_ Renjun _

He starts running. His feet move in wide strides, but he can't feel the ground beneath them. He floats. Every step that he takes, he goes higher up in the air. He's flying, but he feels trapped.

_ Renjun _

He tries to escape the familiar voice echoing around him, but when he thinks he's getting farther away from it, the closer it sounds.

_ Renjun _

He falls.

Renjun wakes up with a gasp. He blinks in the dark, eyelids shaking the blurriness away.

The clock's hour hand points at the number  _ three. _

He screams, but the silence doesn't break.

_ Renjun _

He breaks into a cold sweat. His vision has settled into the night, despite the weight pulling his eyelids close. He fights the feeling away, moving as his limbs would allow him. They don't.

_ It's just a dream _

Renjun doesn't recognize the voice as his own, but he listens. Breath heavy, arms numb, throat clenched, he screams. He screams even though he knows no sound would escape his lips.

_ It's just a dream _

This time, he stops trying. He wills himself to go back to sleep, to ignore the pressure on his chest. He pleads his mind to go back to its peace. He can't.

_ Wake up _

Suddenly, his pinky is gently tapping on his mattress. Little by little, the feeling spreads on his other fingers.

Then, he jolts awake.

The clock ticks loudly.  _ Three AM. _

He turns to lie on his stomach and buries his head under his pillow.  _ Please,  _ he pleads to no one in particular,  _ I just want to sleep. _

He does. His breathing steadies at about five minutes past three.

_ RENJUN! _

He's shaken as he sits on his bed, once again awoken by the voice. His feet drop to the floor, and he tumbles his way onto his desk again, peering through his windows. He fidgets when he looks at the sky and sees nothing but stars. The noise his drawer makes is too loud for the hour as he pulls it open, looking for his lighter. His fingers feel for it, but instead it touches string. Curious, he pulls on it, and out comes a hoop covered in twine.

His hand plays with the web of yarn, taut and intricate. A note sits in the middle.

_ Here's our present! Put it to good use. - Yango and Duckie _

He hangs the dreamcatcher by his window. It makes him feel at ease, somehow. It's enough to pull him back onto his bed and under his blanket, face buried in his pillow.

"Goodnight," he whispers.

The moon appears from behind the night clouds, eclipsed by the lattice catching its beams.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

x-x-x-x-x

The next day, Renjun weaves his way along the crowded hallway. Unlike yesterday, his morning classes are busy, as are the students whose footsteps are heavy. Likewise, Renjun's feet drag on the floor. His thoughts echo in his mind, swirling with the voice from last night. 

He pulls on the sleeve of the person beside him, begging him to move more slowly. His mind prompts him, telling him to just speak, there's nothing to lose if he just asks. 

He does.

"Yangyang, you told me you could see ghosts, right?" 

It was a few minutes after European Literature, a class the two Chinese freshmen share. Renjun spoke in hushed tones, afraid that people would think weirdly of him if they heard him talk about the supernatural.

"I didn't lie, by the way." Yangyang, on the other hand, couldn't care less about people's opinion of him. "I  _ can  _ see ghosts." His pride in his ability is detectable.

"Okay then, I need help. Something happened last night."

"Hit me with it, broski." 

The sunlight hits them when the older guides them both to the field. He really should be in class right now, but there's a sense of urgency shrouding all logic known to him, and he knows Yangyang couldn't care less about missing a class. He knows his friend is always ready to listen.

And so Yangyang does. He listens to Renjun's stories from the night, braces himself for the questions, and answers him to the best of his ability. He might have let a chuckle escape one or two times into his friend's soliloquy, but they're mostly because of how bemused he is with the tales. It might also have been caused by the transparent worry in his friend's voice.

"Renbro, don't worry so much," he says. "Didn't you say the dreamcatcher worked?"

"It did, but I don't know, man." Renjun speaks with distress. "What if it wasn't just a nightmare? What if it was something  _ more _ ?"

"Well there's someone I know who could help with that… maybe. I'm not really sure."

"Bro, any kind of help would be really great right now," the older's voice is still tainted with trouble.

"Okay, but you can't complain."

"I mean, I'm the one asking for help. Why would I complain?"

"Yeah," the younger hums and nods. "Just a head's up. The person I'm talking about is Donghyuck."

Renjun almost strains his neck with how quick he turns his head at the sound of the name. He's about to make a fuss, but his friend is swift to avoid his grumbles. Yangyang's already halfway through the courtyard before Renjun can even get up on his feet.

By afternoon, Yangyang has brought Donghyuck up to speed with Renjun's troubles. The eldest tried to shush him, not wanting anyone to overhear, but once the phrase  _ sleep paralysis  _ reached Donghyuck's ears, he couldn't stop the two from spouting theories about what could have triggered it.

"Maybe it's your old house ghost coming to visit you to congratulate you on your first day in college," suggests Yangyang with more vigor than necessary.

"Exactly why would a ghost come to congratulate me for getting into uni?"

"I don't know, Injun, might be a friendly ghost," Donghyuck says with a snicker, which Yangyang promptly humors by humming the  _ Casper the Friendly Ghost  _ theme song.

"I know I told Yango I wouldn't complain but you're really making it hard for me not to." 

"You did, didn't you?" It might be too hopeful of Renjun to believe his friend's voice is bridled with sincerity. "Okay well I know how to help you, I promise."

Donghyuck even raises three fingers in an attempt to punctuate the genuineness of his words. Suffice it to say it works. Maybe Renjun's desperate.

"Let's say it isn't a ghost. You don't think it's a ghost, do you, Yang?" the brunette offers some helpful words.

"I don't think it is, I didn't feel it," the youngest answers.

"Wait, were you really serious about seeing ghosts?" Renjun, still unbelieving, asks. "Wait, it doesn't even matter. I'll humor you. So, what is it, then, if not a ghost?"

"I don't know, my little Broger Rabbit. Perhaps it's a de—"

"Perhaps it's just the alcohol in Renjun's system." Jeno, quick on the uptake, joins the conversation as soon as he arrives. "He was pretty buzzed last night."

“Come on, Jeno.” Donghyuck rolls his eyes. There are times when he's grateful they have a logical one in the friend group, but matters like this don't require reasoning—at least not the human kind. “Don’t ruin the fun.”

"Maybe Jeno's right." Renjun is usually easily agrees with Jeno. "But..."

"But? You know I'm right. You don't really believe them, don't you?"

"But what if it happens again? When I'm sober? I've had dreams like these before, Jeno."

"You know what we could do?" Yangyang, sensing the tension brewing in the air, quips. "Let's hunt!"

"Don't you think that'll be too dangerous?" Donghyuck's voice quivers with worry. 

"Nah, I've done it before. So, what do you say, broskis?"

Normally, Renjun would have agreed right away. He's a believer, he's supposed to think these things are real. Heck, even he has some things about his life he can't easily explain to his friends. This time, however, fear holds him back.

"Brojun, there's nothing to be afraid of. We'll all be there. Yangyang and I will be. Jeno?"

Jeno stands his ground and warns his friends not to do it. No, he doesn’t believe in ghosts, he says, but he doesn’t want them to risk getting possessed or anything.

“But...” a soft plea conquers the blonde’s senses. 

Now, Renjun doesn’t pull this card that often on Jeno, but that makes it even more effective. Not that the blonde would reject him any other time he’d use it. He has long ago accepted his weakness for the tiny boy.

A weakness that’s currently being taken advantage of as his little friend breaches his personal space, face lined up so close to his. Those puppy eyes would be the death of him, he surmises.

“Please,” the boy begs. “If it’ll make you feel any better, you can come sleepover the night I do it.”

Yangyang and Donghyuck share knowing smiles. They’ve won this battle.

“Fine.”

x-x-x-x-x

When the moon wanes high in the darkness, the four are back in Room 1136. Unlike the night before, everything is in its place. Shoes are sitting on the shelf, candles on the desk, bedsheets still in disarray, but that's just how they usually are.

  
  


"So here's the thing," Yangyang says. "You just have to ask the ghost what it wants." 

He makes his way around the small room, as if it was his first time stepping foot there. His fingers tap on every surface they could reach. He hums an unfamiliar tune, which is later chorused by Donghyuck. Soon, the two are singing melodies unknown to the others.

"You're telling me I just have to randomly speak in different areas of this room to ask the ghost what it wants. Is it that simple?" Renjun waits until the two are done with their song before he speaks up.

"Bro, listen. I got it from a reliable source. Also, I've done this before."

"Hmmmm. Okay. But what if it isn't a ghost, like what you suggested earlier?"

"Then I'll tell you what to do," Donghyuck answers this time.

"And that is?"

"Meh. We'll cross the bridge when we get there."

His friend's nonchalance should trouble Renjun, but he's already braced himself for what might happen. He trusts them. That's enough, isn't it?

He tells himself that again when he's made to scour his place, candle in hand, whispering questions needed to be answered. He tells himself his friends want the best for him when he speaks a little more loudly when they instruct him to. He's fully convinced himself they know what they're doing by the time Jeno puts a halt to their activities.

It's dinnertime, and none of the three know when the blonde went out to get them food, but they don't complain when they see the spread of their favorite street food on the desk. They savor the aroma of freshly made bean pancakes, and let their bodies listen to the grumbles of their stomach.

In the midst of supper is when Renjun struggles with keeping himself from hitting his youngest friend.

Jeno was giving him the rundown of his semestral schedule, marking down his calendars with stickers of every shape and color. Renjun, even though he tried his best to pay attention, spaced out and inadvertently heard his friends' discussion.

"I told you that Wikipedia page was a bust," Donghyuck, bless his soul, cannot whisper for his own good, or for Yangyang's, in this matter.

"Brodude, you know Wikipedia's probably the biggest reason why I got into this uni."

"Still, that doesn't mean it'll work for the paranormal," the brunette hisses back.

The rest of the conversation turned hazy for Renjun, his mind already plotting ways to make Yangyang beg for forgiveness. 

_ He should have known better. _

He really should have. If he did, he wouldn't be snatching his calendar from Jeno right now. He wouldn't be stepping over in fury to aim for his friend's head.

"What were you thinking?! WIKIPEDIA?!" He wouldn't be yelling. "YOU GOT YOUR SHIT FROM WIKI FUCKING PEDIA?!" He wouldn't be hitting Yangyang on the head with said calendar at the moment.

A tornado of curses thrown at the Chinese-German, a mountain of apologies, and Yangyang holding his palms together on the top of his head as he sits on his bended knees later, and the gang is back to their usual.

"I should have known," Renjun scoffs. He wants to let it go, but the memory is still fresh, and he's not one to forget things easily.

"Jun, chill." Jeno comes in between them. "It's late. We should sleep."

"I'm sorry," a meek voice reaches him.

All is forgiven, though. 

At a quarter past eleven, everything is still. The chorus of snores surround the dainty room. Nothing but moonlight and the streetlights cast a glow outside. 

Renjun whispers a soft  _ goodnight  _ to the waning moon, and soon he joins his friend in their slumber.

That night, he dreams of a world of colors, of clouds high above and low below him. Indigo, Magenta, Emerald, and Sapphire clouds float around. He floats with them.

_ Renjun _

Someone calls from a distance.

_ You're dreaming. _

He knows he is. He's aware he can't actually reach the clouds, knows that they aren't supposed to rest on your hand, understands that him sitting atop one isn't possible in the real world.

He floats away from the voice. Nothing good ever came out of him chasing it. He rides on his emerald cloud and he flies into the darkness. He greets his friend, the moon, and tells him about the voice. He asks him questions he knows will be left unanswered.

_ Renjun _

The moon speaks to him, sending a warm breeze on his neck.

_ Renjun _

The voice vibrates in his ear, and his eyes open.

_ Ren— _

He jumps from his bed when he feels the warmth rest on his skin. He's awake, but he still felt it.

"Jun," a soft voice alerts him of his surroundings and he reaches out.

"Ow!" the same voice, a little louder now, exclaims.

"Lee." It takes a while before everything becomes clear to him. "Donghyuck."

"I—" the voice stammers. "I'm sorry."

The room is flooded with lights, and groans escape his friends' lips. 

"You three!" Renjun yells. "Out of my room! Right now!"

"But—" Jeno protests.

"OUT! NOW!" Renjun's voice booms, almost as loud as the bang the door makes when he jerks it open.

It was two in the morning. Renjun rests on his bed, stirring in fury.

_ He should have known. _

Sleep usually comes easily to Renjun, but right now he's much too aflame with rage that he can't go back to his dreams. 

He peeks at the moon, and it shines, smiling back at him. It sends a quiet breeze, a lullaby.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

x-x-x-x-x

Two weeks.

It took two weeks for Renjun to simmer down. He's back to speaking terms with his friends now, and it only cost them their meal allowances for a fortnight, and maybe some grovelling for garnish.

"It was just a prank, bro." Yangyang catches him in the library, taking advantage of the place's rules on silence. He knows Renjun won't explode at him there.

"Some prank," the older laughs in scorn. "I swear to god, Brogan Paul, if you do it again..."

"We won't! We promise!" Donghyuck shout-whispers from behind one of the bookcases. "Forgive us, please?" 

A couple of weeks ago, his friend's voice was the one that's been pulling him from his dreams, and he hated it. Not as much as he hates it right now, when it squeaks, and his friend couples the high voice with a finger to his lips. Perhaps Donghyuck plays the puppy eyes card against him, and his cheeks heat up—in rage or embarrassment, he doesn't know anymore.

"Fine," Renjun hisses. "Now go away. I have a paper to finish writing."

The two snigger and raise fists up into the air. Yangyang's hand hits one of the shelves and a clang reverberates through the building. Glares and angry hushes come their way, and Renjun aims for their hair, but their swift moves allow them to escape him. 

Donghyuck runs away, whispering quiet apologies to the other students in the room, and Yangyang is left to apologize to their friend again.

"Oh, by the way, Jeno didn't have anything to do with it," the boy explains, but he doesn't need to.

"I know," Renjun says matter-of-factly. "He came by the following day and already explained his side. Even brought me some treats."

"Wow."

"What?" There are some thoughts hidden in Yangyang's eyes, and Renjun can sense them.

"Nothing." The boy doesn't give in. "Good luck on your paper! See you soon!"

"Not in my dreams, I hope."

"I promise. Never again!"

With that, Yangyang makes his way outside the library and Renjun is left to labor on his research for the rest of the day.

x-x-x-x-x

By the end of the afternoon, Renjun's back in his dorm room, hunched over his desk, eyes glued to his computer screen. The other residents are making a ruckus outside, and he curses at the dormitory management's bad timing. The welcoming party should have been held during the first week of classes, really. 

His groans dance with the clickety clack of his keyboard, and he groans some more with how ridiculous his professor's expectations are. But he can't complain, not when his paper is due twenty minutes from now, and he's still a ways away from the required word count.

The scented candles aren't helping either. Sure, the scent of lavender surrounding him helps ease his stress, but only for a little bit. The flickering flames are making his eyes heavy, however.

He takes a breather to stare outside his window, and he isn't surprised when only a dark indigo greets him from outside. It's a new moon.

He groans again and stands to close his curtains. He's not very fond of the dark night.

At a little past midnight, Renjun is long done with his paper, and he's killed his free time attempting to drown out the noises from outside his room. He's had space to socialize, but he just isn't in the mood to mingle, not tonight.

He blows the candles out, and cozies onto his bed.

Sleep comes easily to Renjun. Under his warm duvet, surrounded by his soft pillows, and captured by darkness, it doesn't take long for him to drift into a sound sleep.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber.

_ Jun _

Darkness. Nothing but darkness.

_ Injun _

Silence. Nothing but silence.

_ Huang _

Nothingness. All around him.

_ Huang Injun _

Dreamless. Renjun's dreamless.

_ Wake up _

_ Wake up! _

_ WAKE UP! _

Renjun feels. He feels the coldness of the night. He feels the darkness around him. He feels the heat resting on his palm and in between his fingers.

He stirs awake.

"I swear to fucking god, Lee Dong—" He opens his eyes, expecting to be greeted by his friends annoyingly familar face. "What the fuck?"

"Is that how humans say 'hello' nowadays?" 

Before him—above him—is a face he's never seen before. He ought to scream. He should call for help. He should really be yelling for someone to come pull this strange man off of him. 

But he can't.

He's too mesmerized. The man's face is close—too close to his. He can feel the heat hitting his face, but it's not air. There's no air coming with the heat. The person's long eyelashes are just a few inches away from his, and he can't help but stare into the man's eyes. A deep brown, too deep it's almost black, but they hold his friend, the moon, in them.

"Who..." he manages to stutter out. "Who are you?"

"My name holds too much power for you to utter it."

"Try me," he dares.

"Na." And it does. It holds such an enormous power that's sending shivers down Renjun's spine. "Jaemin."

"Na Jaemin." The name rolls off his tongue, and it feels foreign yet at the same time familiar.

"It's nice to see you, Huang Injun," the man smirks. "Friend of the moon."

A name from his childhood. 

"You know me?" Renjun tries to rise, but the man is much, much too strong. "Excuse me."

"Yes, little human?"

"Can you please get off me?" his words come out in tangles, his voice too weak.

"Only because you asked so nicely."

The weight is lifted off him and Renjun feels like he's about to float. He's half sure he would were it not for the hand still holding his own.

"And this?" Surprisingly, it doesn't take a lot of his energy to lift their hands together. "This feels a bit Edward Cullen-ly."

The man—Jaemin laughs. He laughs and it comes in thunders.

"You dare compare me to a vampire? Not even a real one! A vampire! Made by human's nanoscopic understanding of the world beyond! Stop breaking my heart, my love."

"You're not human." It shouldn't make sense, but it does.

"I am what you humans call a demon."

"What the fuck?" At this point, Renjun can't keep the words from coming out of him.

"Hello again, tiny human, but greetings are done, aren't they?"

"No, that doesn't mean 'hello.' Oh my god, an actual demon! In my room!" the boy's eyes sparkle in delight. "Oh shit, should I say that in front of you? Doesn't his name make you weak or something? Wait, I should say it more then. God. Oh, God!"

Thunder reverberates around the room once more.

"My little moon friend, I expected more from you. I've heard that name time and time again and I'm still here, alive.  _ Immortal _ ."

"But wha—"

"Silence."

Renjun doesn't dare speak. He  _ can't  _ speak. Words form in his mind but they fizzle into nothingness before he can utter them. He panics.

"Relax." The demon places his hand on the boy's forehead. The night breeze sings him a sweet lullaby, and everything turns into darkness once again. 

Jaemin speaks to him in his sleep. He sings. He answers questions swimming in Renjun's mind. He touches him. He does so in a way that the boy rests at ease in his arms that are as warm as the sun as they embrace him. He cradles in his own hands the other's, and his fingers draw crescents on Renjun's palms. 

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

x-x-x-x-x

Come morning, Renjun wakes up to the aroma of sweet syrup, pancakes, and coffee. The sun is bright and unforgiving. He rubs his eyes to relieve them from the somnolence still lingering upon them.

"Good morning, my love."

The boy should be surprised, but he isn't. He knows last night wasn't a dream. He felt the heat beside him in his sleep, after all. He heard the quiet songs the night breeze always sings to him. He knows.

"You can come out in daylight?"

"First, breakfast. Answers later."

The scene ought to bring him to laughter, seeing how ridiculous it is. A demon, in his clothes. His sweatpants don't make it to the man's ankles, and his hoodie that's two sizes bigger on him fits too well on the other. It's amusing to watch Jaemin sip on his cup of coffee, when his eyes light up after each sip, as if it's his first time drinking it.

There's an atmosphere of ease when Jaemin smiles at him, and Renjun's not one to be hyperbolic, but he knows, he definitely does, that he's going to live past lifetimes and universes with him. Maybe he already has. Perhaps he is, at the moment.

"We're not soulmates," Jaemin explains once Renjun finished his second serving of pancakes. "If you aren't aware yet, I don't have a soul."

"I  _ know  _ that, but I feel like you're no stranger to me."

"That, I am not. I've watched you for a long time, Huang Injun. As you have I."

"Who are you, then?"

"I already told you."

"Na Jaemin. Yes, I know your name. But  _ who  _ are you?"

"You will know. Soon, but not now."

"When?"

"Let two moons pass and you will know."

The answer suffices for now. Renjun can wait. He does. He will.

Come high noon, Renjun's friends are crowding the tiny space of his room again. Questions keep on raining from his chatty friends, questions he's already asked. Answers come as much, answers he's still elated to hear.

"How come you're awake during daylight?" Yangyang looks like a little boy meeting his idol for the first time. He's resting his head on his hands, and his elbows on the desk as his eyes follow Jaemin's every move.

"My kind never sleeps." Jaemin's voice is deep and raspy, and when he speaks, there's always a shroud of mystery over his words.

"Your kind? So you mean demons?" Donghyuck has already asked plenty of questions, but they don't end.

"That's what you humans call us, yes."

"So what really are you?" Jeno rarely ever sounds cross, but his question is loaded.

Jaemin can sense the weight in the air, and his eyes go dark for a fleeting second, before he turns to the human and speaks bemusedly.

"I can be anything: a stranger, a friend, an enemy. Your choice is what makes me who I am."

The human mumbles something in response, something the others can't hear. He says it so only the demon can hear him, for his words are for him alone.

"You will learn to speak with respect, human." 

The sky turns red when Jaemin snarls.

It turns lilac when Renjun rests his hand on the demon's thigh.

It becomes light blue when Jaemin takes the hand in his.

"So..." the youngest of the bunch breaks the tension. "I think what Jeno meant to say was, since you say us humans call you a demon, what do you call yourself?"

"I call myself many things. And you, human, will call me Na Jaemin."

"Sweet! He has a human name." The boy nudges his equally fascinated friend whose mind is moving faster than his lips could manage.

"How old are you? Like vampire kind of old, or like us old?" Donghyuck's speech finally catches up with his thoughts.

"Hah!" The demon's eyes light up in wonder. "I am older than those who live on this Earth, but younger than the Earth you live in, and lightyears younger than the sun. But age only matters for you whose lives are fleeting. I am not shackled by the chains of time. I am forever."

"And how long will you stay here?" Renjun asks gently for fear of letting his emotions show. What he intends is not to inquire, but to make a request.  _ Stay here forever. _

"That is a question I shall answer when the sun sets."

Twilight comes early in autumn. When the sun rests and the stars wake up, the room is silent again. Candles sit alight on the desk, the dreamcatcher swings with the winds of the night, and the atmosphere is swirling with distant chatter.

Renjun's visitors left before dark, having run out of questions to ask. Their indulged minds thought it better to rest, but not without a promise to come back for future sustenance. That is, save for Jeno who had grown speechless early in the afternoon, only offering a few mutters and gestures to express himself.

Jaemin enjoyed the afternoon. He made it known to Renjun how much he appreciates his friends, and how much he looks forward to seeing them again. Even the grumbly human, he said.

Renjun apologized for his friend's finicky demeanor, telling the demon that the boy wasn't usually like that, that something must have been bothering him. Jaemin understood, much more than Renjun did.

But that was hours ago. Talking about different people had ended even before the sun set, and the two moved on to matters more essential to them.

They talked about each other. Jaemin asked how Renjun was, like how an old friend does when he meets someone after a long time of disconnect. Renjun told him stories of years past, like how an old friend would, starting from the moment they left off.

By the time Renjun has to go to bed, they were attached, as if there never was a divide between them. As it should be.

“How long will you stay here?” the boy asks again when they're both resting on his bed. Him under the covers, the other beside him but free.

“I will be here when you fall asleep,” comes the answer.

“And when I wake up?” Renjun yawns, and Jaemin smiles at him.

“You will have to say goodbye. Send your regards via the sun.”

“Will I see you again?”

“Look at the sky when the stars are bright above you, and you will know.”

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

x-x-x-x-x

Two weeks.

Two weeks have gone by and Jeno is satiated with the demon's name. He never dared utter it, the  _ demon  _ is how he introduced himself, and that is how Jeno called him. The demon whose name doesn't rest from his friends’ tongues. He who disappeared in the middle of the night, but whose existence has bothered him since.

Even now, when the four are supposed to be studying—that was the plan, after all, since they all have preliminary examinations in a couple of weeks. The beginning of their day was a scene out of high school: a caffeine-scented room, cups of coffee unfinished and turning cold sitting dangerously near their handwritten notes spread on a big table, Donghyuck's hair in disarray from him having ruffled through it in moments of distress, Yangyang reciting his lessons in verses, and Jeno and Renjun quietly jotting down outlines for their revisions.

It wasn't until Donghyuck had his third stress panic that the group descended into another chat about the immortal. Renjun was the one who broke their momentum, suddenly speaking of the days he's lived waiting for the man who was once just a stranger in the night. Jeno distances himself from the discussion, but even burying his face into his books won't help keep him from it.

“Did he say when he was coming back?” Yangyang has asked before, Jeno knows, but that doesn't stop him from asking again.

“He said he would, but didn't say when,” Renjun's answer is the same every time.

“Huangbro, you miss him, don't you?” Donghyuck jeers, but his intent is still laden with concern.

“I do,” the answer is hesitant. “I don't know why, but it feels like an old friend left me. I mean, not just left me… but has left me  _ again. _ ”

“Ooooh,” Yangyang singsongs, “sounds like little brodude is smitten.”

Renjun would have protested. He would have told Yangyang off, but before he could do so, his attention is snatched by a thud on the table, of paper crumpling, and then the sound of wood scratching the tiled floor. He watches Jeno's retreating back and jumps in his seat when the door closes with a bang after the boy.

The three left behind share puzzled looks, but Donghyuck and Yangyang just shrug it off, already aware of what's bothering their friend. Renjun, however, doesn't take it for nothing. He knows how their friend gets when exams season is near.

The soles of his shoes squeak as they hit the floor when he runs after Jeno. He shades his squinting eyes with his hand when the daylight hits his face. It doesn't take much for him to find the boy as he hears grovel being kicked in anger. He hears his friend grumbling, things he can't hear from a distance.

“Jeno? What's wrong?”

“I'm fine,” the boy says through gritted teeth.

“And I'm Peter Pan. Come on now, bro. What's eating you?”

“I just,” angry tears threaten to escape Jeno's eyes and he looks down. “I'm frustrated.”

Renjun reaches his hand out, and hesitates at the last second. His hand hovers right above his friend's shoulder, patting the air. It used to be easy, comforting Jeno, but these days it's more difficult than Renjun would like to admit.

“Tell me what's wrong.” He retracts his hand when Jeno faces him and pretends to wipe it on his jeans. “Is it because of the exams?”

Jeno huffs, eyes not leaving the ground. He wants to make things easier for him and just answer in the affirmative:  _ yes, it's the exams.  _ But taking the trouble-free path right now means trouble later, and Jeno's not one to prolong his agony.

Still, the uncertainty settles in his chest and he takes a frustratingly long while pausing to gather the things he wants to say.

“Jeno,” Renjun waves his hand in front of the boy's face. “Is it because we got sidetracked?”

“You've been too distracted lately,” his friend mutters.

“I have? I don't think anything's changed, though. I haven't been missing any classes. I'm way ahead of my requirements, and I've never even missed a hangout with the bros.”

Jeno laughs. He laughs but his smile doesn't reach his eyes. They're still watery when he finally faces his friend, and again he laughs.

“Nothing's changed? Really? Nothing eventful happened recently?”

“I mean, there's that thing with Jaem—”

“Please, I'm so tired of hearing his name.”

Renjun doesn't know why his friend sounds so defeated. He doesn't understand why Jeno wouldn't want to hear about Jaemin. Surely, he should be fascinated like the rest of them. It's not everyday they get to meet the supernatural.

“I don't understand, Jeno...”

“I don't understand you, either.” Jeno doesn't mean to sound harsh, but his words escape him quick, before he can even detach his emotions from them.

“Why does it sound like I'm at fault here? What did I even do? You're the one who's been weird. I don't know, man. Ever since Jaemin—”

“Jaemin!” Jeno explodes. “Again! God, I'm so sick of that name. ‘I miss Jaemin, Yangyang,’ ‘Do you think Jaemin will be back soon, Hyuck?’ Even when you're still sleepy when I pick you up for breakfast, you still can't keep his name out of your mouth! And now? We're supposed to be studying! In case you forgot, you're still human, Huang Renjun. A student. One who needs to pass his classes. But it seems like you're planning to put ‘Na Jaemin’ on your answer sheets at this point.”

“Okay, I get it,” Renjun says. “I've been talking a lot about him. I'll try to tone it down, okay. But Jeno…”

“What?” Jeno's voice comes out soft, he's already tired of talking.

“Do I have to be sorry for being happy?”

“Renjun…”

“Jeno…” this time, Renjun doesn't hesitate when he rests his hand on his friend's shoulder. “I'm sorry I've become so irritating about this. It's just that I'm so excited. Imagine, a demon showed himself to me. Not to anyone else, but me! I try to tell myself that maybe it's some random glitch in the universe, but that's not how I feel. Jaemin appearing in my room, it felt special. It made me happy.”

Jeno's shoulder slumps low beneath Renjun's hand. He pauses, thinking of what to say next. He kicks the ground, stalling. One, two, several kicks later and his voice is filled with uncertainty when he speaks.

“Does Jaemin make you happy?”

“Yes,” the answer comes out fast. “I don't completely understand it either, but he does.”

“What about me?”

It's Renjun's turn to pause when he feels his friend take his hand. He feels the way Jeno trembles as he clasps their hands together.

“Do I make you happy?”

_ You do,  _ Renjun wants to say. Jeno does. He makes Renjun happy. But both of them know his question holds a different weight. Something that's made more apparent when Jeno stands up and pulls him close. It's crystal clear when Renjun feels Jeno's breath on his cheek.

Jeno moves to edge the space between them. His eyes are fixated on Renjun's lips and it takes forever for him to inch closer. His breath lands softly on Renjun's lips.

Renjun steps back.

“I'm sorry.”

Jeno hears the rustling of the leaves around him, he hears the heavy steps his friend takes, he hears them fading away from him. When he looks up, he can barely see Renjun's retreating back, his vision blurry. His tears finally fall when he's alone.

The waxing moon smiles down at the world that night, contrasting the harsh winds howling in the darkness.

Renjun tosses and turns on his bed. He dreams.

He dreams about stories from his childhood.

In his dream, he hears his mother singing a song that used to lull him to sleep. He listens to her stories of the world around them. She tells them about his friends in the sky.

About the sun, whose rays are a warm embrace to the people, telling them never to lose hope for when he shines, it is the day, a promise that there will always be a new beginning.

About the stars, twinkling at him. They're there to light his way when it gets too dark. Don't be scared, they say. He won't lose his way.

About the moon. In his dream, his mother tells him his favorite story about the boy who fell in love with the moon. She taught him to wave at it, so that it knows that his smile can be seen.

He dreams about chasing the moon. But it's become a boy. The boy smiles at him and he feels warm. He reaches out to hold his hand. He doesn't want the boy to run farther, but he stumbles and falls. Soon, the moon is far away until he can't see him anymore.

“Jaemin…”

Renjun wakes up to another day.

  
  
  
  


x-x-x-x-x

It's been another fortnight, two weeks, since Jeno's outburst. 

To say it was awkward between him and Renjun would be an understatement. 

When Renjun came back without Jeno in tow, Donghyuck and Yangyang had plenty of questions. Questions their friend chose not to answer. He tried to appease them by saying everything would be okay, and he silently hoped the same.

Things are okay.

They're okay if okay means them stepping back into their routine acting as if nothing happened. On the first day immediately following their conversation, Renjun feared Jeno would avoid him. After all, that was what he did back in high school.

But Jeno showed up in front of his door that day. He brought their friends along with him. Jeno smiled when Renjun stammered to greet him a good morning. He played along with their friends when they pulled Renjun out of his room, with promises of a hearty breakfast before their plan to coop themselves up in the study hall again.

That day was free from distraction. At least, when Yangyang and Donghyuck made to ask about Renjun's immortal friend, he was quick to dismiss them. He told them he wanted to focus. The exams are soon, and he wouldn't want any of them to fail.

And focus, he did.

He tried his best to keep his mind on his studies. He tried hard, but his head is filled with Jaemin. 

Jaemin and Jeno. 

Jeno…

Jeno who was sitting quietly, headphones on, drowning his surroundings. Since he took a seat at the other end of the table, Renjun had never seen him look up from his books. He didn't see him look his way again. He didn't because Jeno would only look up when he's sure his friend wasn't staring.

At one point, the timing betrayed him and their eyes met. Jeno looked away. He wasn't ready. He wasn't prepared to see his friend's apologetic eyes.

It took a while before Jeno could pick himself up. He told himself he was better than this. Sure, he had let himself wallow in his sorrow, but there were things to be done, responsibilities to face, and he really should be thinking of other things then.

He had a plan.

He had to talk to Renjun again. He'd apologize, tell him he was sorry for making him uncomfortable. He wouldn't backtrack, though. He wouldn't tell him he didn't mean to try and kiss him because he did. He just wanted Renjun back. He wanted  _ his  _ Renjun back.

Maybe it was too late. Maybe he couldn't get him back anymore. But it wouldn't hurt to try.

Or maybe it would. Jeno told himself he could get hurt, but he'd still try. Perhaps. One more time.

But not right then. Right then, he had to push it back, wait a few more days. The exams were looming, and he knew he wouldn't forgive himself if he let himself fail. Worse, he wouldn't want to mess things up further for the both of them.

Tonight.

It's tonight. 

Tonight, Jeno walks the path to Renjun's dormitory. The sky is empty. The stars are hiding, and the wind is cold. A thunder rumbles by, and the leaves shake above him.

He shivers at the cold breeze touching his skin and he embraces himself to chase some warmth. Plastic crackles in his hand, and bottles clink inside it. He smiles.

He smiles because he knows Renjun will be happy. He knows everything's easier for the both of them when there are bottles emptied before them. He knows words come without effort. That's how it always is. That's how it used to be.

There's a skip in his step as he walks down the hallway, dodging other residents walking his way. He knocks a playful rhythm when he gets to Renjun's door, and he beams when it’s pulled open just a few seconds later.

But it isn't Renjun who welcomes him inside.

His smile falters.

“Your human friend is here,” Jaemin announces.

“Who?” Renjun is just stepping out of the shower when Jeno puts his shoes away. “Oh, hi, Jeno!”

“You're back,” Jeno deadpans.

“I am,” the demon answers.

“He is!” Renjun pretends not to feel the rigidity in the atmosphere. “And he's going to tour the campus tomorrow, with us!”

Jeno's purses his lips and dares not talk. He nods. Jaemin smiles.

“What brings you here, human?”

He doesn't answer. Instead, he hands his friend his gift and bids him goodbye. He's sorry, he says, and they'll talk soon.

Everything's fine, Renjun answers, and bids Jeno goodbye.

Jaemin asks about Jeno that night. He desires to know what happened, and what brought about the unexpected visit. Something tells Renjun he already knows, but he still answers. 

Jaemin asks more. He wonders who Jeno is, what he is, to Renjun.

Renjun tells him stories. Stories from when they were children, when he used to chase after Jeno. Jeno was a quiet boy with a pretty smile. He didn't have many friends, only Donghyuck who's known him since birth. Then, Donghyuck became Renjun's friend. Jeno became his friend too, soon after. Yangyang was a happy addition to their friend group come high school.

Jeno was a good friend to Renjun, and then he was something more. But all Renjun ever did was chase him, and by time, the boy got tired. He tired himself dry by chasing after a boy who only saw him in the peripheral, always a sideway glance, because the boy was too busy chasing his dreams, and he didn't have the time to stop to let Renjun catch up.

By the time Renjun finishes his stories, the room is illuminated with starlight, casting shadows of dark green. He notices how Jaemin has been quiet the whole time he's been speaking, and he apologizes.

“I enjoy listening to you talk,” Jaemin tells him. “But now it's time to rest, beloved.”

“I can't sleep.”

“You must be tired. You told me a lot of stories tonight, you should sleep.”

“I can't sleep,” Renjun insists. “I can't without knowing how long you'll be here.”

“I'll be here when you wake up tomorrow,” comes a promise.

“And the next day?”

“Sleep, my love, and don't worry about the waking hours. I'm here beside you right now, aren't I?”

Jaemin pats Renjun's head in assurance. The boy feels him beside him. He feels his arm right beneath his neck. The heat on his shoulder tells him that Jaemin is here, right now. But still, he can't sleep.

“Don't be restless, love. There's nothing to worry about.”

“Can you help me sleep?” Renjun requests. It was easy for the demon to lull him to sleep before, but he doesn't want a quick descent into slumber. “Tell me a story.”

“About what, my dear?”

“About you.”

The demon pauses. His eyes twinkle with the stars above.

“Do you remember the bedtime story your mother used to tell you?”

“About the boy who fell in love with the moon?" Renjun answers with a question.

Jaemin chuckles, and the stars dance with his voice.

“Your memories deceive you, my love.”

“No, I remember perfectly,” the human insists. “My mother used to say that the crescent moon smiles at the earth because the boy is smiling back at him. Because the boy loves him so much and the moon is sorry he can’t be with him, so he just smiles, because he knows that’s what the boy loved the most about him.”

“The moon smiles because he loves the boy,” Jaemin corrects him.

“Does he? Does the moon really love him? But mama said they couldn’t be together. The moon lives in the sky, and the boy on earth.”

The demon smiles, taken back to years yonder. He thinks back to the curious little boy back then. Renjun's voice comes with the same sparkle of wonder.

“But the moon fell in love with the boy,” he continues his story. “Much earlier before the boy knew him. Even before the boy was able to love. The moon has always loved the boy. For lifetimes past, and for lifetimes to come.”

“Has he really loved him for that long?”

“Forever. Now tell me, friend of the moon. My beloved. Huang Injun. Does the boy love the moon?”

“Yes,” the answer is clear. “Yes, he does. That’s what mama always told me.”

“What about you? Do you love the moon?”

“I love him. I do,” the human says, voice firm.

The stars trip and sway and spin, and the night wind croons a joyful song.

Renjun floats. Gravity fails to take a hold on him when he's pulled tightly into Jaemin's embrace and it showers. It showers kisses upon his face, his ears, his forehead, his cheeks, his eyes, his nose, and his lips. His breath lilts as he waits for the kisses to reach his lips. He counts the seconds he feels the heat hover above them before he drowns in it. 

The heat spreads through his body and it sends shivers down his spine.

The stars dance. They dance with the rhythm of their lips. The wind sings. It sings them a song of love, and it moves them.

Renjun’s eyes feel heavy when he pulls back. He has to, his breath already stolen from him by the other's lips, and he breathes heavy. He smiles.

“Do you love me?”

“I do, Na Jaemin. I love you.”

“So the boy does love the moon.” A quick kiss, a couple more, and he rests his palm on his beloved's forehead.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

x-x-x-x-x

  
  


The sun peeks from the clouds, bashful. Birds chirp a spirited song, and gale dances in swirls around the trees, shaking their leaves in an applause.

Renjun awakes at the absence of heat beside him, but his worries are put at ease when the aroma of coffee and breakfast pull on his senses.

“Good morning, love,” Jaemin greets him with a wide smile.

“Good morning,” he murmurs back, his own lips spread into a grin on his face.

There’s warmth in silence, and the two don't speak thereafter. The events of yesternight linger in the atmosphere, and they bask in its snugness.

Time moves fast for Renjun today, as a sudden fear of the night creeps up into him.  _ How long?  _ He asks himself.  _ How long until he leaves again?  _ His mind chants as he moves about, living the day.

The question doesn't leave him, not even when Jaemin holds his hand and guides him to his friends.

The day has begun and the clock keeps on ticking. Renjun tries to push the thoughts away, but they remain in a prominent corner in his mind.

“Jaemin! It's nice to see you again,” Donghyuck and Yangyang speak in unison.

Jeno walks with them. He stays silent, not letting it known that he noticed Renjun's hand clasped with Jaemin's. He gives them a curt nod and lags behind them.

The hours go by blandly.

Renjun still isn't sure why the demon asked to spend the day with him. Surely, his routine life isn't that interesting. Not to an immortal, at least. But Jaemin insisted, and Renjun was easily swayed.

Renjun can't complain. He can't, when the day passes by with boring lectures that are made better with intertwined hands under the desks. He feels great when his stomach flutters with every whisper tickling his ear. Jaemin's side comments in World History make him giggle, and he's left amused at how the books appear to be biased, when the demon mumbles at how inaccurate the lessons are.

He really can't complain about the stolen kisses in the halls when they're sure nobody's looking. 

He, admittedly, is thankful that his day is colorful, in contrast to the grey the past few weeks had been.

But he dreads the night.

He silently curses the twilight when it comes.

Renjun is in love with the purple hue that stretches out into the horizon when the sun says goodbye, but not today.

Today, he simmers in his forebodings about the looming darkness. He sits silently on his bed even when his friends call on him.

Empty bottles lie around his bedroom floor. The night outside is quiet, disturbed by the rowdiness in his little space. Renjun lets the heat settle inside him, he wasn't able to refuse the shots his friends sent his way. He wanted to, afraid he'd snooze too early, but he couldn't.

The heat sits in his stomach, but it's cold beside him.

Jeno stole the space next to him, and Jaemin was left to observe the two as he sits on the floor, answering Yangyang and Donghyuck's slew of inquiries. 

"What I don't understand," Jeno speaks by his side, "is how you're all fooled by him." The boy's words are slurry, and he sways and laughs. He's had a bit too much, and he rests his head on Renjun's shoulder.

The merriment is shattered, and Renjun ought to speak up but he can't. 

The room turns hot, the sky red.

Jeno stands, he stumbles, and he rests his hand on Renjun. He doesn't speak yet, but his eyes are as fiery as the heavens.

"Don't test me, human," the demon growls.

Jaemin's laughter comes in thunders, and his fury in lightnings. The red sky flashes white.

"I'm not afraid of you, demon."

Jeno aims to cross the space separating him from the demon, but a hand pulls him before he has the chance, and he falls. He hears a yelp from under him and he sees the pain in Renjun's eyes.

The sky turns dark.

Everything happens as quick as lightning. The winds come in waves, too powerful for the humans, and soon the room is empty, save for Jaemin and Renjun.

"Tell your human friend to mind his words and his jealousy."

The demon disappears as fast as his fury, and the room is empty. 

Renjun feels empty.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber, but he's no longer ready to face the days ahead.

x-x-x-x-x

Three weeks. It's been twenty one days since Jaemin disappeared.

Renjun seems to have disappeared with him, Jeno feels.

It's been three weeks of weeping, of Renjun begging his friends to make him come back, to look into whatever voodoo books, websites, gazettes they could find to just have him reappear. Yangyang and Donghyuck tried, but they couldn't.

Renjun has been talking to the moon. He does it everytime Jeno visits to bring him food, to remind him to just eat. He's human. He still needs to be alive.

It's been twenty one days and Jeno's feeling defeated.

When he's not trying to keep Renjun afloat, he distracts himself with his work. There's too much to do, and he's been striving to juggle everything together.

It's three in the afternoon on the seventh day, and he's forced Yangyang to help him study. Maybe he just needs somebody to be there with him. Maybe his friend will help him avoid worrying about the boy who's cooped up in the four walls of his tiny room.

“I still don’t understand.” Jeno drops his book on the table with more force than intended, out of frustration. “Why he’s so determined to keep that creature on this plane of existence.”

“Jeno, Jeno, Jeno,” the Chinese boy tsks. “Do you not understand how love works?”

“Bro...” he looks at his friend with disdain. “Really?”

“Oh shit, bro. I’m sorry.”

Jeno just groans as he picks his book up. He doesn’t have the energy to explain himself further.

“Sorry,” his friend apologizes again. “I know you understand love. I’ve watched you... suffer since middle school.”

He feels a consoling pat on his back. Suddenly, he can’t seem to read his book anymore, vision blurry.

“And since I know that,” Yangyang continues, “I hope you also understand that maybe it’s time for you to let him go. Let him love someone else, if that’s what’ll make him happy. You understand, right?”

A few pages haphazardly turned, several heavy sighs, and many restless taps on the desk make the Chinese boy speak again.

“Think about it, bro. If you were in my position, what would you do for the one you love?”

Jeno’s answer is clear in his eyes, but it seems the other can’t see it.

“Me, I would do anything I could for him.”

“Me, too,” he finally uses his words. “I’d do anything to make them happy.”

"So what do you say? Let's help Renjun find his happiness back?"

The moon smiles at them as they make their way to the dormitories. Its crescent form beams on their path. The breeze sings them a song of regret.

Yangyang hums with the wind, preparing himself for its caution.

When they reach Renjun's room, Donghyuck is already there. They don't need to ask why he's still outside when they see the panic sketched on his face. 

"I've been knocking for fifteen minutes now. I even called him, but he hasn't answered any of my calls."

"Don't panic," Jeno says, even though he's worried himself. "I'll call the RA, have him open the door for us. I'm sure Jun's fine. Maybe he's just asleep."

He is.

When they eventually got inside the room, they immediately hear his loud snores. There's tissue scattered on the floor and at their friend's bedside. He's been crying again. 

But when is he not?

Jeno tells himself not to panic. At least Renjun's getting some sleep. He appeases himself, silently chanting apologies. It's his fault. He knows it is.

He just wanted what's best for Renjun.

He misunderstood what it was before, but now he knows.

Jeno doesn't panic. That's not normal for him. But when Renjun starts screaming in his sleep, weeping still, he does. He runs over to him, like he's used to, and places his palm on the boy's forehead.

Fire.

Renjun's skin is burning like fire.

Tears burn Jeno's eyes as the panic sets into his whole being. He tries to pull himself together but he still stammers as he gives instructions to his friends to help alleviate the fever. He stumbles as he fetches a glass of water. He cries.

He cries when he holds Renjun upright, whispering  _ I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. _

x-x-x-x-x

Saturday.

It's a Saturday, six days since Jeno cried that night. It's been almost a week since their friend burned a high fever. Five days since Renjun asked him not to apologize. It wasn't his fault, he said. Sometimes, there are just things he couldn't control.

Renjun's friends have been checking up on him regularly. They've been making sure he gets his health back up, that he drinks enough water, and that he sleeps.

He told them he does, but not so well.

He told them he's alright, he really is, but the fevers still come at night.  _ It's Jaemin, I know it is _ . He repeats the words relentlessly, as if that would be enough reason. 

They stay with him alternately, just to make sure he wakes up in the morning. He does.  _ Good as new _ . Six times, he's told them, but they can't help but worry.

He still goes to his classes. He's doing fine, really. He's on top of all his schoolwork. He doesn't think about Jaemin that much anymore. Only at night, when the fever comes.

At seven thirty on that Saturday night, Yangyang calls his friends. Something's up with Renjun again, he said. He doesn't know what to do, he wailed.

What greets Donghyuck and Jeno gravely exceeds their expectations, however.

Instead of their friend lying on his bed, face buried on his pillow, sobbing silent sorrows, they see the boy afloat.

Renjun's toes barely touch his sheets, his limbs stretched out, his head facing the ceiling. Donghyuck tries to pull him down but his skin is hot, too hot to the touch.

“I—” Yangyang stammers. “I thought I could do it. I just wanted to help.”

“What did you do, Yango?” Donghyuck's voice drip with concern.

“I got this book from your room,” the boy's voice falters as he tries to explain. “I thought— It had something about summoning in it. I tried, I really did.”

“Calm down, Yang.” Jeno pats his friend's back. “What happened?”

“I just,” sobs threaten to escape the boy's lungs, “read the chants. I thought it would bring Jaemin back. It said… the book said it'll summon anything, and I thought it could help.”

Donghyuck snatches the book and scans the page where it's been left open.

“Yang, it says here the time is essential. When did you start your summon?”

“I don't remember,” Yangyang answers in blubbers, “I think the sun was setting then… It wasn't—”

"WHERE'S JAEMIN?" Renjun booms, but it's not his voice his friends hear. It's much more shrill, more childlike.

"We don't know," Yangyang cowers in fear at the unfamiliar voice.

The voice shrieks in laughter.

"Are you scared, human?" It taunts.

"Please." Donghyuck is surprisingly calm. "We don't know where he is."

"Tell him Renjun needs him," it commands.

"Who are you?" Jeno placates his nervosity to ask. "Jaemin isn't here."

"Oh," the voice deflates the same time Renjun's body slinks down onto his bed. "Humans, look at the moon. How does it look?"

"It's a new moon today." Donghyuck keeps his composure.

"Jaemin will be back soon, Donghyuck. Tell him the sun said sends his greetings."

"I will," the human promises.

Renjun's body turns limp at the vow. The pillows catch his head and he blinks, now awake.

"Renjun? Renjun are you alright?" Yangyang is the first to ask their friend, wiping the tears still streaming down his face.

Renjun doesn't answer for his eyes stare in awe at the figure behind the boy.

"Huang Injun. I'm back."

Renjun eyes turn into crescent moons, smile spreading on his lips.

The man takes step after step to reach him, and his hand rests on the boy's. Heat captures his palm, his fingers, and the spaces in between.

"I'm sorry I took too long." His other hand caresses Renjun's cheek, thumb wiping away the tears that have started pouring. The boy answers with a shake of his head.  _ I waited for you,  _ his eyes say.

Fire.

There's a fire ablaze in between them, their lips, their hands, their skins, all touched together. The flame flickers with the movement of their mouths, and they are both captured. Everything around them turn into ash, for they are the only ones existing at that moment.

Fire.

The fire dances in the night and in their eyes as they look into each other.

"I love you," the demon whispers, and the heat sits on Renjun's lips.

"I love you too, Moon."

The night is bright as the moon in the sky sits in full bloom, smiling at the two of them.

An awkward cough from behind them startles Renjun, but Jaemin doesn't allow him to pull away. His hand is his, at least. For tonight, and the nights yet to come. Thunder fills the room and the demon greets the humans, saving a particular apology for Jeno, and the tension is subdued when they ease into conversation.

By midnight, the three bid their goodbyes to the two, everyone in high spirits after matters were settled. Jaemin can't stay for long. The moon isn't always in full bloom, after all.

"Oh, by the way, Donghyuck, Chenle sends his regards." The demon calls after the humans' retreating backs.

"Tell the sun I'll see him tomorrow!" the human answers.

"Wait, what?" Renjun raises his brows in disbelief.

"And Yangyang, Jisung says he misses you. Come visit his tomb soon!"

"I will! Tell him to come visit me in uni, that little poltergeist is too lazy!"

"What the fuck?"

"And hello to you, my beloved." Jaemin places a soft kiss on the boy's lips.

"No, I meant what the actual… Yangyang can actually  _ see ghosts _ ? And what's up with  _ Donghyuck _ ?"

"Those are some stories that can wait for another moon." Jaemin pulls Renjun back to his bed and lays him down. His palm presses on his forehead, and once again, the boy's breath steadies.

Renjun rests in a dreamless slumber until the sun rises to welcome a new day.

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> [1] Buzzfeed Unsolved The Terrifying Axeman of New Orleans
> 
> to the prompt-giver: thank you so so so much! i had a lot of fun writing this, and i hope it meets your expectations. it kind of went into a lot of directions so i'm not sure if you'd like it.


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